Merry Solstice!

Dreams are all I have

Mercury retrograde. Full Moon in Gemini... its all kicking my ass. Been weepy thinking about my first year without my Mom. Normally this would be the week that I would be over there decorating their tree. Mom and the dogs would always hang around. Marylynn would be super chatty and I would have her full attention.

It always made the holidays tolerable for me as a non-christian. I celebrate the Solstice and the return of the light. But this year is so dark. I'm just so upset about work and family intrusions on my privacy. I struggle with being so lonely when here in Fort Collins.

I did hear from 2 of my FoCo female friends today and that was sweet. I also called my HS photo teacher, Mr. K, and we chatted awhile. I hope to see him next weekend.

Life is tough. I just see next year as being another kick in the ass. All that Ive fought for will be torn down by a crooked fuck.

Goddess lets hope I get a good job. A boyfriend would be a bonus. If not? Then lets hope I just end up in Dublin with enough coin in my pocket to stay away for 4 years. Dreams are all I have.

5 Lessons